Are You a Delilah?

 

He that goeth about as a talebearer revealeth secrets: therefore meddle not with him that flattereth with his lips. (Proverbs 20:19).

Or are you a secret keeper? Can your husband, family, and friends trust you with their heart? Or are you known to carry gossip and share sensitive information about others that can damage their reputation or affect how they’re perceived by others? Biblically, Delilah, Samson’s mistress is known for being an enticer who led Samson to his downfall (Judges 16). In Hebrew, entice means to delude, deceive, enlarge, and persuade in a sinister way. Samson confided in Delilah by sharing his weakness – his shaved head. Delilah used this information to subdue him and bring affliction upon him.

If you can answer yes to any of the questions below, then you might be a Delilah. Confess your sin (1 John 1:9), repent, and consult Jesus on how you can go about restoring relationships that you may have damaged in your wake.

·        When someone has offended you, do you bring up their past mistakes or damaging information to criticize their character to get even (this can also be done in a passive-aggressive manner)?

·        Do you broadcast information that may be embarrassing to another person such, as sharing information about their medical status?

·        Do you use the weaknesses of other people as an advantage to get ahead in life, instead of helping that person to build on their strengths?

·        Do you use your words to flatter or persuade others to get what you want?

·        Do you love money (1 Timothy 6:10)?

 

Delilah is a destructive spirit, the name itself in Hebrew means amorous one of the night; poor, weak, languishing one. If you’re uncertain that you carry this spirit, ask God to show you.

XOXO,

 

Jay

Compassion: Woman 2 Woman

Finally, be ye all of one mind, having compassion one of another, love as brethren, be pitiful, be courteous: Not rendering evil for evil, or railing for railing: but contrariwise blessing; knowing that ye are thereunto called, that ye should inherit a blessing. (1 Peter 3:8-9).

As women, we are more compassionate to members of the opposite sex than we are to each other. You would think that we would be a lot nicer and softer because we can understand what we, as women go through. We are quicker to judge, condemn, and criticize one another than we are to encourage each other. So the next time you come across a fellow sister, and she appears to be struggling through the day, cut her some slack and be a lot more understanding. Do not be so quick to put her down because she's having a bad hair day, in a bad mood, or has gained a couple of pounds. You don’t know what she had to face when she got up this morning or what’s going on in her life.

Here are some tips that we should consider to show each other compassion:

·        Be kinder to the meanest of women, understanding that they are struggling with coping with a great loss or hurt in their lives.

·        Do not criticize the next woman for not being “knowledgeable” in certain life areas. According to Jesus’ standards, we do not always make the mark, that’s why he gives us grace and mercy (Isaiah 53:6; Romans 3:24).

·        Be an encourager in your words and deeds. All of us need encouragement to be the best women that God has called us to be.

·        Be patient and forgiving with each other as Jesus is with us (Colossians 3:12-13).

·        If a woman comes to you asking for advice, instead of giving her your personal opinion, always consult God's Word first to see what Jesus says about her situation.

·        Be transparent. If your approach is acting like you have it all together, then your words and actions will not be impactful.

Remember, showing compassion is an act of love.

XOXO,

 

Jay 

The Salvation of Jesus vs. The Independent Woman

 Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit of itself, except it abide in the vine; no more can ye, except ye abide in me. I am the vine, ye are the branches: He that abideth in me, and I in him, the same bringeth forth much fruit: for without me ye can do nothing (John 15:4-5).

You can have the salvation of Jesus or the independent woman mentality, but you cannot have both. The Bible defines salvation as deliverance, victory, prosperity, help, aid, health, and welfare. In Hebrew, salvation is referred to as Yahshua. Jesus is Yahshua, our salvation – whatever you need him to be at the present moment.

The dictionary defines independent as free from outside control; not depending on another's authority; not depending on another for livelihood or subsistence. An independent spirit exudes selfishness and pride. It only thinks about "I" and not what God wants for my life. It's also a trap for low self-esteem because if "I" doesn't meet set expectations, then "I" feels like a failure. "I" also tacks on a lot of unreasonable and unrealistic outlooks and burdens that are impossible for any human woman to meet and carry.

A spirit of independence keeps us from experiencing the salvation of Jesus. An independent woman’s mindset says to Jesus that “I am self-made. I do not need your help physically, emotionally, spiritually, and financially. I do not need you.” So, therefore, she does not get to experience His forgiveness (this is why she still feels guilty after repetitively asking Jesus to forgive her for past sins) or have an enriching, life-changing relationship with him. An independent woman also misses out on the opportunities to have enriching relationships with others because an independent spirit is controlling, dominating, unwilling to compromise, rude, obnoxious, boisterous, argumentative, unforgiving, unyielding, and overbearing. Independent is a state of isolation. So, therefore, she is often lonely and miserable, no matter the façade she portrays.

Independent woman, take Jesus’ hand and find relief from the heavy burden and unrealistic expectations that you have placed on yourself. Allow Jesus to be your Savior and Lord over your life. Let him make you a new woman. Jesus’ burdens are light and his yoke is easier than the ones we place on ourselves (Matthew 11:28-30). Jesus wants us to have life and life more abundantly, but we cannot have this in the spirit of independence.

At the end of the day, outside of having material things, where does an independent spirit get you? Do joy and peace follow your life?

XOXO,

 

Jay

Let Love Be the Standard

 

And though I have the gift of prophecy, and understand all mysteries, and all knowledge; and though I have all faith, so that I could remove mountains, and have not charity, I am nothing (1 Corinthians 13:2).

Allow love to set the bar for everything you do. When you wash dishes, do it in love for those that eat off the dishes and love for Jesus who has made the way for you to have dishes to wash and soap to wash them with. If you serve others at a soup kitchen, do it in love, knowing that Jesus died for those that you are serving, so they are worthy of a full hot bowl of soup and a kind word or smile.

Let love be the standard for how you treat those that seem “hard to love,” understanding that at one point and time you didn’t make it “easy” for Jesus to love you, but He still pursued you anyway; forgave you of your sins, and healed your sicknesses. His love saved you from your destruction and crowned you with loving-kindness and tender mercies. Jesus’ love doesn’t condemn you for every sin that you do and nor does His love put you away (Psalm 103:9). So let love set the bar for how you deal with others.

Love seeks to get an understanding so that you can come to a resolution for reconciliation. It’s willing to see both sides and hear the other person out without jumping to conclusions. Love makes provision without having to be asked. Love provides emotional and spiritual stability, protection, confidence, compassion, empathy, nurture, affection, and financial security. Love is longsuffering – is Jesus not patient in His dealings with us when we're struggling to let go of past habits? Love is kind. Love is not pained at seeing another have and nor does It seek to make others envious. Love does not seek retribution when it is wronged. Love chooses to see the good in others, versus their faults. Love gives others the benefit of the doubt. Love is willing to endure, be patient, and it always hopes for a better outcome. Love makes people better, the giver and the receiver.

Remember, without love, we are nothing. So everything we do let it be done in love.

 

XOXO,

 

Jay